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Why Mentors Matter and How to Find One

By Ian Riley, assistant director for Retention Services, St. Mary’s University (TX)

There is a famous psychologist, Lee Vygotsky, who had this to say about how people learn, “Through others we become ourselves.” When you think about how you became skilled at something, what do you credit for how you became that way? Typically, someone has to guide you: a teacher, a family member, a coach, or a friend. Through the expertise of another person, your goals and dreams become a reality. More importantly, it is through the close and meaningful relationship you build with your guide — or mentor — that makes the difference in helping you achieve your goals and be the person you are striving to become.

While a tutor is undoubtedly someone you go to when you are grappling with difficult math concepts or want to brush up on your writing skills, mentors provide a very different type of support. Mentors are people that will walk with you through life’s challenges beyond the academic by giving a helping hand, an empathetic ear, sage wisdom, and constant encouragement to help you achieve your goals in life. Put another way, mentors are supportive and trustworthy individuals who lead by example and seek to empower you to find your own capability to succeed. Though mentors are exceptional individuals, they are not super-human. At one time, they were just like you, but with experience (and perhaps a mentor of their own) gained the necessary skills to develop themselves and others. More importantly, mentors have a deep concern and passion for the success and welfare of others.

You might be wondering how you can find a mentor. The good news is there are probably people in your life that are already acting as a mentor. Think about the positive and prominent people in your life who have made a direct impact on the way you think and behave. This could be at work, at home, or at school. These are usually people who already possess the character traits, knowledge, skills, or experiences you are hoping to acquire, especially as you work towards your ultimate goal of attending college.

Remember: Mentors are the people who help you reach the next level in your goals and aspirations. All it takes to find them is to be aware of the positive and influential people around you that care about your interests, goals, and well-being.